


This is home now

by shewritesrandomscribbles



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Daenerys Targaryen Is Not a Mad Queen, Jonerys, Targaryen Babies, Targaryen Restoration, jonerysendgame
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-17
Updated: 2019-09-17
Packaged: 2020-10-20 10:03:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,600
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20673572
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shewritesrandomscribbles/pseuds/shewritesrandomscribbles
Summary: Dany takes the seven kingdoms. Jon is leaving soon.





	This is home now

“Not quite comfortable, is it?” Her voice startled him a bit, making him stand upright. He was surveying the city to make sure everything is well before he rides for Winterfell and found himself wondering about the certain throne in concern. He does not want to leave this soon but he also didn’t know what else he could do. Dany had been avoiding him since they arrived here in King’s Landing. And Jon is left wondering what he could say to her if she decides to have a talk with him. It’s all so complicated and his head is spinning just by thinking about it. He knows he loves her though, that much hasn’t changed.

“Your Grace.” He barely managed to say when she walked into the throne room. _She is radiant,_ was all he could think about at the moment. Her hair is in intricate braids, more complicated than he remembers. Behind those beautiful purple eyes though, lingers pain. They haven’t spoken to each other for days and as much as he wants to walk from his chambers to knock at her door once again, he couldn’t. “_I didn’t take you for a coward, brother.” _He could almost hear Arya teasing him as he tries to sleep at night.

_Your Grace? Guess we’re back on that now, aren’t we, Jon Snow? _ Dany thought to herself.

“After we won the battle, I came here. Before I realized what was happening, a crown is being lowered on my head and I am sitting on the Iron Throne. It was what I fought for, what my Dothraki and Unsullied cross the Narrow Sea for. What some of them died for before the battle even began.”

A pause.

“This is what I swore I would take with fire and blood.”

Her hands skimmed the iron blades; with a far-off look in her eyes. “I looked around and saw the smallfolk cheering, screaming for their Queen. Smiling and looking up to me, just like Viserys said they would be when we take back the seven kingdoms. They were rejoicing and celebrating, for me. I should have been celebrating with them, but then I thought these people do not know me. They will just bow down to whoever sits on the throne. Weren’t they the same people who cheered when Ned Stark was beheaded here? The same people who would’ve slit my throat when I was a child for a bit of gold? Their loyalty wavers easily. Still, I bathed in the glory. In spite of it all, in that moment, I never felt so alone.”

She looked back at him and smiled. He held her gaze and let her continue. “I sent Ser Jorah on a quest to find a cure because I told him I want him by my side when I take back the seven kingdoms.”

She looked around. “Where is Ser Jorah now?” She lightly shook her head.

“Dead.” Her words were cold. Guilt and grief and sadness with it. ”Just like Ser Barristan, like Viserion and Rhaegal and Missandei.”Each name uttered with icy cold voice. He felt his heart clenching, a pang of guilt building up his stomach. Her eyes continue to stare at nothing in particular, eyes becoming glassy due to unshed tears. “I’m so sorry, Dany.”

“Poor beautiful Missandei who did nothing wrong, she just chose to follow me, she believed in me. She died in chains, did you know?” He shook his head lightly. “I was…”

She continues. “The very same ones I fought all my life for to eradicate, to unchain. I sat on this Iron throne. And I felt nothing.”

He just stood there, like a mute. He had no notion of what he is supposed to do or say. He knows she is still grieving and while they managed to throw Cersei off the throne without turning the entire city into dust, some northern lords still remains adamant about a Targaryen on the throne. _Stubborn northern fools. _Jon is grateful that at least all the remaining Starks had already pledged their loyalty to Daenerys. It wasn’t an easy task but they have worked out their differences. His brother and sisters, _cousins, _even met Drogon on one occasion. Sansa was terrified, Bran remained unaffected and Arya was excited. He was nervous Arya would ask Dany to let her ride Drogon, even once. Before he knows it, he had bid them farewell and then they rode for King’s Landing.

He informed Dany that he plans on going back to Winterfell after the war. _That was barely a war, _he thought. The Golden Company dropped their swords at their feet the moment they saw Drogon. They have sworn fealty to Dany but she did not want their services. She had the Unsullied and Dothraki, an army who she trusts, an army who fights for her not for gold but because they truly believe her and they love her. 

Arya, Sansa and Bran will need help rebuilding Winterfell and managing the northern lords as well. He did not know what leaving means for him and Dany though_. Did he expect she’ll ask him to stay? Did he want her to? Yes, a voice inside his head whispered. _He had pushed her away because of their shared bloodline. His siblings told him it is also a custom in the north, not as common as Targaryens marrying off siblings but Starks had married their own kin as well. _“She’ll be good for you, you know? She’s pretty much the one person who can keep you from brooding.”_ Arya even told him. It’s not that he didn’t want her anymore. _Gods, only a fool would not want Daenerys Targaryen. _It’s that this is all still confusing for him. Everything, from his parentage to his own name had been a lie. He was forced to live a life being shunned and shamed for being the bastard that he never really was.

At nightfall, when he thinks about it, he feels anger towards Ned Stark. He understands him but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t get to be a bit mad at him. Then he would recall Dany’s stories of horror while they were on the ship. He knows that had Ned told the truth, he will be living on the run, just like she did. Perhaps he will be dead like his siblings, his _true _siblings. She was but a child running from people who want to end her life, all for gold from a King. _Did they even know they’re about to murder a child? _How could his father, _uncle_, befriend a man who would kill a babe for her father’s sins? A child is innocent and should be innocent of the evildoings of their parents, no matter how bad they were.

This woman standing in front of him now, he couldn’t fathom the pain and fear she had to live through all her life. Even as she stands here with the entire seven kingdoms at her mercy, she still looks sad. He wishes this shit world would stop hurting her. She broke his thread of thoughts when she spoke once again. “I couldn’t sleep for days, I’ve always thought I would finally have a home after I take the throne but nothing about this feels like home.” Her hand went to her stomach and it stilled there. His eyes followed the movement, as his breath hitches. “And that’s when I felt it.” She looked down on her belly and run her fingers through the soft fabric. “It was a soft kick but enough to make her presence known. As if she is letting me know that I am not alone, that I don’t have to be anymore.”

Jon stared at her, mouth agape. He barely noticed the tears threatening to spill out of his gray eyes. “You’re… we...” She nodded at him, offering him a sad smile before putting the mask back on, he hates it when she does that.

“Go home, Jon. Go back to Winterfell.”

He was so taken aback by this news he barely registers what she was saying. A child, _his child, theirs. _Suddenly, nothing else mattered. He didn’t care if he shares Dany’s blood, he didn’t care what everyone would think. He loves her and he will love this child. Why would he go back to Winterfell when Dany is here? How did he even think of leaving her behind? Why is she ordering him to leave? Doesn’t he get to decide for himself? Why would she think he’ll be alright with leaving her here with their unborn child?

“Is that an order? Do you not care what I have to say?” He says with a higher tone than he intended. His face softens as he steps towards her, he made to take her hands but she stepped back immediately.

“Dany, how can you think that I…”

“You don’t want it.” She cut her off; tears are already streaking her face. Her words are pained and he cursed himself for still causing her hurt. _His Dany_. This world does not deserve his Dany. “…as you had never wanted the throne; as you never want me. You’ve avoided me like plague when you found out and you can barely look at me. I’m making it easier for you.”

“Easier? By what? By denying me my child?”

He presses his fingers to his temple as if to suppress an impending headache. “I needed time to think, Dany. I needed to come to terms with how I feel about my parentage. It doesn’t matter to me anymore. I don’t care about what anyone will think; I was just too afraid to admit it before. I am not anymore.”

“Your family is expecting you. They need you.” She told him nonchalantly, not providing any answers to his queries.

“And you?” He says rather quickly before he had a chance to take the coward way out.

“It doesn’t matter what I want or need. I will do what my child needs me to do.”

“Our.”

“What?” She snapped back.

“Our child, Dany.” He took her face on his hands, this time she let him; his thumbs gently caressing her face. “You do not have to do this alone. My family would understand if I stay here. You’re my family. And with this little one coming, I don’t intend on leaving you both now.” _Not ever. _He thought.

He saw the confusion in her eyes, before she could voice out her concerns, he answered it for her.

“I was scared of having a child of my own because I don’t want to father a bastard who will live the rest of his life miserably, like I did.”

“You told me that.”

“Aye, I did. But you make everything seem better somehow. That night, I didn’t care about anything. I let myself wonder how our child would look like if we ever have one. Will they have your eyes because gods, they will be beautiful if they look like you.” He laughs; tears are falling freely down his face now.

“When you make me promises, I believe them all, I believe in the world you want to build. You didn’t care that I was a bastard, that’s how I know that as long as you are the Queen, no child will ever feel unloved or unwanted. How could you think I won’t want this child; a child of my own? Did you really think I don’t want you anymore?”

“You certainly didn’t give me any reason to believe otherwise.” She thinks back on their time in Winterfell when he refused her.

“I didn’t want to lie to you or keep anything from you. And I had to deal with the truth, all in a short amount of time.”

“You could have talked to me sooner, Jon. Why do you always believe that you have to do things alone?”

“I should be asking you the same thing.” He counters. She looked down to avoid his gaze but he held her face firmly, never wanting to break eye contact.

“Marry me.”

“No.”

“No?” Hurt reflected in his eyes.

“No. You’re only asking because I am carrying your child, Jon Snow.” _You are afraid of fathering a bastard. Not that I will let anyone call this child a bastard. Not that I will let anyone call any other child a bastard ever again._

“I’m asking because I love you, Dany.”

“You were leaving before I told you, going back home. Had I never told you, would you have chosen to stay?” She was pushing him away; she broke away from his touch and made to take her leave.

He followed her and grabbed her arm while she yanks his hand away. “You will drive me mad one day, woman. Why are you being so stubborn?”

That made her smile a bit, she was thankful she had his back to him, _I guess we both are then, _she thinks. She wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of seeing her cave in. “Well, you’re one to talk.” She instead said.

“Well, I’m staying. Whether you want to or not. I’m not leaving King’s Landing. I’m not leaving you again when you need me. I’ve made that mistake once, I won’t do it again. The only way you could make me leave is if you tie me on Drogon’s back and ask him to take me back North.”

That did it, she laughed and he joined her right after. “Drogon will drop you to your death before you even reach Winterfell.” Jon just shrugged. 

She have always won every argument she and Jon ever had but she knows she won’t win this one. She is sure she does not want to. They had all the time they need to figure things out and she is done depriving her heart of what it wants, _who it wants. _She knows Jon feels the same way. This world had taken a lot from them already; they will not let it take them from each other as well.

So she gave in. “Alright then. I will marry you.”

He felt his heart flutter, he touched her face and was about to lower his face to hers when she added “if you ask me properly, Jon Snow. Only then.” She smiled at him and moved away. She greeted Grey Worm near the gates as she walked.

_My Queen, what’s your first order? _ He asks in Valyrian.

She swore to Tyrion she would break the wheel. She will do just that and more. She swore to protect those who cannot protect themselves. In her reign, she will make sure that no man, woman or child will have to die of hunger. Daenerys Stormborn of House Targaryen will make sure that no more innocent lives will be taken during wars, as she intends to keep the peace for however long she lives. And then after her, for years more, by this child growing inside her. She had never known any real home. Now she does. Home is the comfort of Jon’s arms, home is the soft kicks she feels on her belly. Home is wherever her child is. _And wherever he is._

Jon walks behind her, eyes still glistening from more unshed tears. He swore to himself that his duty to her and their child will be the only one that matters now. He will marry her in front of every weirwood tree in Westeros if she lets him.

_Take the throne in the dragon pit. _She instructed Grey Worm in Valyrian.

“I want it burned. “

**Author's Note:**

> My heart still hurts for Dany so here's my little fix.  
Also, this is a world where the Starks actually like Dany because come on, Arya would never pass a chance of seeing and riding Drogon.  
I wanted Dany to burn the Iron Throne as a parallel to her promise of breaking the wheel.
> 
> I don't know how and why I keep writing these one-shots but they wouldn't leave me alone so I had to write them down. :)
> 
> Also, I want to thank you all, kind strangers for your sweet words. It really means a lot.❤️


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